So there’s the wisteria, and then there’s the ivy. The wisteria is a nigh-invulnerable infestation similar to a b-movie villain… dastardly, nefarious, and numerous, but eventually beaten to submission. Sure, it pops back up for the sequel (Wisteria on a Plane: Death Smells Fantastic) but it can and will be beaten.
And then there’s the ivy.
The ivy is everywhere. Everywhere. If it’s not paved or a tree, it’s covered in ivy. In fact, most of the smaller trees are covered in ivy. And wisteria. But mostly ivy. The bottom third of most of the larger trees are covered in ivy. If something has been left outside for a couple of years, it has been covered in ivy.
I described the situation to a guy at the local gardening center and asked for a recommendation. He told me we should find a good realtor and look for an apartment. But I think we might go with goats.
Apparently goats are murder on ivy. I had always heard about renting livestock for various purposes… dogs to chase geese, geese to eat berries, and so on. I just hadn’t realized that there was a nationally-renown goat rental agency local to Greensboro. For about $400 a day, you can rent a herd of goats and the goats do what goats do.* We’ve been planning to remove all of the ivy ourselves by hand, as hiring specialists to douse an acre and a half of land with chemicals and then haul the dead stuff out is close to $2000 and dang that’s a baffling amount of cash to give to someone to poison your yard.
So we’re looking into goats, because goats are cute, are environmentally-friendly(er), and we might as well go ahead and solidify our reputation as the neighborhood’s resident Crazy House before the holidays come around.
* I’m assuming this will involve some cleanup following the goats doing what they did, but such is life.